Crazy...

I think I'm gg crazy these few days. Probably becos I'm thinking and expecting too much. Somethings made me wonder and question the logic behind most things. It doesn't matter how long u know someone, 5 days or 2 months, usually u will only remember those with u recently. It doesn't matter what promise u makes, once forgotten, it is gone. Money also doesn't really matter as long as the amount isn't large and that u are rich enough. Well... I think I'm too stubborn at times. Too inflexible to consider other options or possibilities, always sticking to the conventional methods or ways things are supposed to function. I need to adapt to changes and always come up with a plan B or even plan C. Things wun always end up the way I want. I need to stop being an idealist.

There are times when one has to make some sacrifice. Sometimes even forgoing something which u want dearly. As long as I think it is worth it, I'm willing to sacrifice my everything, to even die for that something that is close to my heart. Sounds crazy enough, but that's what I'll really do. Will u do the same for someone or something close to u? How much are u willing to sacrifice? Then again, the valuation of the "worth" of anything is subjective. One might find it important, the other might think it is trivia. Although I'm willing to do all the sacrifice, it doesn't mean that I'm happy abt it at all. My selfish self will always cause me to feel unhappy abt it. My mind will always be asking me why I have to do all these sacrifice and not maintain or insist on doing things the way I want. Sometimes, it is out of love. I love her too much to make her feel sad. Shall learn to control my emotions and learn to be more cold blooded.

I felt much better now. Suddenly everything becomes clear. I know what to do already. I need to be myself.

You got that certain something. What you give to me, takes my breath away. Now the word out on the street, is the devil's in your kiss. If our love goes up in flames, it's a fire I can't resist... (quoted from the song Crying by Aerosmith)