A losing battle...

Yah, I know. It doesn't take very long for me to realised that I am too ambitious. My senses hav signaled to me that the outcome is negative, yet again. Sigh, so used to feeling this way that seems like it is only right. I shdn't hav got myself too close. This trap is so obvious, I shdn't hav allowed myself to fall into it, shd hav escaped while I still can... I need to get out of there before the arrow gets any deeper. Further more, not only do I not hav any advantage, but more ships will sink if I participate. Let's just say that I lack confidence in that area, but I've never won, so u can't blame me, my morale is low. Betray is never an option for me, sacrifice is. If it will be better that way, den so be it. That memory shall never be erased from my head, that feeling will never be lost from my heart.

Thou shall not fight anymore battles, tired of losing.

She could see from my face that I was fucking high. And I don't think that I'll see her again, but we shared a moment that will last till the end... (quoted from the song You're beautiful by James Blunt)